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I deciphered them in the office of Dr Maya, the beautiful Harvard-trained Colombian endocrinologist who was to be my physician. Her help was vital because the tests had measured things I had never even known I had. My liver enzymes, for example. My aspartate aminotransferase was 55 when it should be below 50. My alanine aminotransferase measured 100, when 60 was the top of big women the normal range. Fatty liver, apparently. My total cholesterol was 5.4, my triglycerides were borderline at 149, as was my HDL, or "good cholesterol", at big women 40. My ratio of good to bad cholesterol was 5.2 big women when it should have been less than five. Ugh. The good news was that my blood and urine suggested a borderline low-to-medium coronary risk. But the really bad news came from a different test altogether. The Intimal Media Thickness Scan is not, as it sounds, a test of journalistic acumen.
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